I’ll never forget the day my friend sent me an event link for Buffy the Vampire Slayer Live!, the hilarious drag parody of the television show of the same name. Halloween was approaching and I had just committed to a romantic relationship with my boyfriend. I saw this situation as the ultimate test: Would he prove his love by dressing as the teenage werewolf to my teenage witch, attending the 90s television event in full costume? Or would our relationship turn to dust, just as so many vampires have by the Slayer’s hand? Well, prove his love, he did. We even won the costume contest for dressing as Oz and Willow.
While we knew the night would cement our love forever, we had no idea that we’d both also fall in love with show’s star, Michael Phillis. That night, we discovered that in every generation, there is a chosen drag queen. She alone will wield the strength and skill to take on the role of Buffy Summers and give Sarah Michelle Gellar a run for her money. Michael is that Slayer.
Recently, I was lucky enough to talk to Michael about the sweat, fake blood, and tears that went into making all four Buffy the Vampire Slayer Live! shows, which started their run back in 2016. For the first three years they condensed seasons one, two, and three into two-hour performances, and last year they took on the famous Buffy musical episode, Once More with Feeling. I also talked to Michael about what it’s like to be a struggling performer in an expensive city, how Buffy was actually a gay role model, and how you can survive the pandemic by running a mostly-naked carwash.
Thanks to coronavirus, Buffy Live!, which is usually held at a club called Oasis in San Francisco, will not be happening this year. In the End Times, you may be wondering, just as the Scoobies were in Once More with Feeling: Where do we go from here? Well, I say to go to OasisTV right now and watch every performance of Buffy Live! (start with season one) and read my interview with Michael here on the blog. The show is fucking hilarious and it’s inspiring to observe a cast so dedicated to both Buffy and the craft of comedy. It also gives Buffy fans something else to do other than count Nicholas Brendon’s laundry list of crimes and watch Sarah Michelle Gellar do repeated bits on Instagram about how she hates home-schooling her kids.
And now, without further ado, I present to you the talented comedic mastermind: Michael Phillis.
So, how did you end up getting cast in the role of Buffy?
It was just like it was on the show. You know how Sarah Michelle Gellar was originally reading for the part of Cordelia Chase? Well, I was originally reading for the part of Cordelia and I got cast as Buffy. I didn’t know how to do Buffy, really. Cordelia was more obvious to me because of her bitchiness, her tone. Much closer to a gay man, frankly. I was a little hesitant to play Buffy because I had to figure out how to be dramatic and yet have fun around these serious lines.
What a gift it was when it’s all said and done. Buffy is totally my diva. I just never even dreamed, as a kid, that I would have the opportunity to play her. It was like a dream come true that I never dreamt!
How did you get into the zone to play her?
I just thought back to my tormented teen years, then tried to imagine what it would it be like to be a hormonal teen with superhuman strength who is in love with a vampire! It was an interesting thought exercise.
I think that the real challenge of being Buffy is the fight scenes. I wanted to show that fighting is where Buffy’s competence is. She may be awkward in school, but when she’s fighting, she’s tapping into her true nature. What made it difficult was that many of the actors had little to no stage combat training and the choreography was complicated. Also, those swords were real fucking metal with pointy tips! They were obviously stage combat swords, but something can go very wrong very quickly. I had to prepare my body for the work, but couldn’t work out too much because I didn’t want to be a hugely muscled man. I already have this slim, waifish teenage girl body, so it was like, “Okay, good, that’s set.” I just had to put an ass-pad on.
What originally drew you to Buffy the Vampire Slayer in the first place?
I loved Buffy so much growing up because even though Buffy and her friends faced end-of-the-world-shit—but there was always levity, even in the later seasons which got a little dark. I always loved that, especially in the context of me being gay. I think Buffy really speaks to queer people. It taps into the mythos of the teenager with a secret identity. There’s a great coming-out scene between her and her mom, and it’s not about being gay, but it’s about being a slayer. There’s a lot of parallels. Watching her was empowering. It’s a fantasy that made real-life feel a little more tolerable because she was a hero for us queers before we really had out-heroes.
And then when Willow discovered she was gay, that was HUGE. To have a main character go through a discovery of switching teams, realizing that she was a lesbian… you really weren’t seeing a lot of that in media.
There’s also Larry Blaisdell, that asshole jock who constantly sexually harassed girls at school and picked on Xander Harris—who ended up coming out as gay.
Yes. Joss Whedon was not fucking around. He really went for it with gay characters. He wrote for The Man Show which had gay characters, and he wrote for Rosanne when there was a big gay kiss. I remember all these things from when I was a kid. They actually mattered, that representation.
Joss actually wanted Xander Harris to be the gay one in the show, but the rumor is that the network thought a gay guy would have been too perturbing to audiences.
I know! I would love to see that alternate version of history if that had actually been the case. Who knows whether that would have affected the show positively or negatively? I think it totally would have changed Xander’s character for the better.
Ha! Yes! Instead of him just being a perv the whole time.
Totally. Instead of him being that asshole that treats all of his women badly. Poor Anya. Poor Cordelia.
You had me laughing the whole time I watched the shows. Do you have any comedic inspirations?
I love Vaudeville. On stage during the Buffy performances, it’s so rare for us as the actors to look each other in the faces because it’s all about presentation for the crowd. Even when we’re talking to each other, we’re looking at the audience and only looking at each other after our lines are said. That style is very Vaudevillian. VERY drag. It also includes short comic bits that incorporate slapstick with a lot of wordplay.
So, D’arcy Drollinger is the one responsible for adapting the scripts. But since you have such a strong improv and sketch background, how much of it are you adding to it in rehearsal?
D’arcy is really great about letting us play around and add stuff in to make the show bigger with physical comedy. For every season of Buffy we did, we would always start from the transcript of the actual episode. You can find scripts for just about anything with TV, but with the Buffy scripts in particular, you can really see how fanatical the fans are. The stage direction is twice as long as the dialogue because these people sat down and analyzed every single thing, like court reporters. Every time Buffy exhaled it was in parentheses as a stage direction. The written exhale became a way of Buffy talking to her mom. Joyce and Buffy would just exhale at each other in big sighs. With things like this, if it gets a laugh in the room, we usually keep it. Like for example, when I was honing in on Buffy being a bratty teenager while still being a superhero, I turned the way she said “Mom” into a three syllable, whiny-sounding word: “Mwuh-ah-ummm!” In reality, she never said Mom like that, not even close. That is a total derivation from how the show really went, but it worked comedically.
Some jokes are just inherent in the drag. I’m playing a 16-year-old girl, and when Angel meets Buffy, he says, “I thought you’d be taller,” and I’m at least a foot taller than the actor playing him!
Were you nervous at all about singing for the Buffy musical, Once More with Feeling?
Yes, totally. I wouldn’t call myself a triple threat. I wouldn’t say I’m a perfect singer or dancer, but frankly, neither is Sarah Michelle Gellar, so all I had to be is half as good as she was! And I have the luxury of being able to make fun of the songs more than she could.
In the “Walk Through the Fire” song from Once More with Feeling, when Buffy sings, “I touch the fire and it freezes me,” I literally freeze in place. Everything I do has to be bigger and dumber than it ever was on screen.
Did you get to choose your own outfits?
No, but we had great costumers over the years. We found out early on that putting Buffy in jeans wasn’t ever going to work because I just looked like a dude in jeans! We had to put me in skirts wherever possible, and when I was in skirts, they had to be able to move because I had to do stage combat. I sometimes would be in outfits that looked amazing, but I couldn’t fight in them, or they would completely ride up and everyone would see my girly panties. My favorite costume is from season one, which featured my black pleather pants that always made me feel like a badass bitch. I did always have to bring my own shoes. I had a pair of black go-go boots from a previous drag role that you’ll see every year that we did the show. I wear the same damn Buffy wig every year, it’s the real star of the show; it’s been through a lot.
That gigantic hair clip that’s always in your wig is hysterical.
Yes, the fucking clip! It’s very season one Buffy. In the credits for season one, Buffy and Xander are fighting to close a door on a vampire who is attacking, and she is wearing a regular-sized, but very 90s chunky hair clip in that scene. So for the drag parody, we just ran with it and made it so big that you could see it while drunk from the back of the audience! It’s so cheap too. It broke and they glued it back together. It’s such a stupid clip, but it’s iconic for Buffy the Vampire Slayer Live! at this point.
I know you auditioned for Cordelia, but is there anybody in Buffy that you absolutely would love to play that’s not Buffy?
All of the bad women in Buffy I just loved. I loved Drusilla. I loved Glory. Glory basically is a drag queen already so you don’t have to really do too much to her.
I heard through the grapevine that if you ever do season four, Riley Finn, Buffy’s love interest, is going to be a cardboard cut-out.
That was totally my idea! I hate Riley. I just picture myself walking around the stage with Riley as a cardboard cutout saying things like, “Oh, Riley. You are so funny. HA HA HA.” That’s basically what he was. Why not just go for it? Poor Marc Blucas. Even some of Buffy’s one night stands were more interesting. Let’s be real.
How long does it take to put a show together?
A month, basically. We would rehearse four or five days a week for four hours each day, with a bit more work as we approached opening week. A lot of it was flying by the seat of our pants, and the script would get written as we’d go. It was a little scary when we would come into rehearsal at the beginning and there was only half of a script, but we always knew we’d pull it together in the end.
The show is so creative with the props. Do you have any favorites?
I love the Acathla statue that we had in season two. We called her Aunt Kathy. That was basically a demon mask on a Mr. Incredible Halloween costume that was filled with newspaper. I love the mayor’s snakehead and the spiders that come out of the box in season three! I love all of my stakes! They are so stupid. There was a table leg, I think, that they just made into a stake. All the stakes had foam rubber tips on them so that we could actually throw them into somebody’s chest. My crossbow in season two was just a Nerf crossbow.
Buffy fans can be hardcore. Is there anyone who had a negative reaction to how the Buffy characters were portrayed? Did anyone say, “How dare you!”
Ha! We definitely got some Buffy scholars that were like, “That’s not actually how it goes,” but they almost always appreciated why we made the choices we did. We met people that had Buffy tattoos. There was this Swedish couple that came out just to see the live drag Buffy. I couldn’t believe it. I was like, “You bought an international plane ticket to come see this show?”
Your boyfriend proposed to you on Halloween at the end of the season three Halloween performance a few years back. Is that romance still going strong?
Yes! But it’s a long engagement. We’ll get to it. He was just saying last night that we need to get married soon because this year the Supreme Court is probably going to make it illegal. I was like, “Go ahead, bitch and outlaw it. We’re going to do a marriage ceremony anyway, and it’s going to be bigger and gayer than you can ever imagine!” I still have my Claddagh ring that my fiancé gave me—the same exact one that Angel gave to Buffy as a token of love. I have the heart turned towards me, which means I’m still good for it. I love that the proposal happened when I was dressed as a 16-year-old slayer and was surrounded by all these drag freaks and the audience that I love. It couldn’t have been better.
What has it been like as an actor in San Francisco during the pandemic? In the Before Times, I know you were a part of a ton of productions…
2020 was a year I thought I could feel really good about. After performing for the last 16 years, I’d acquired credibility, skills, built relationships, gotten to a point where my work was sustainable. I had my whole year planned out in terms of shows, including Buffy the Vampire Slayer Live! It was the closest that a freelance artist is ever going to get with job security. Then March happened and all performers had the rug pulled out from under us.
You see, I’m a big go-getter. I always like to be working and have multiple projects, and then suddenly, I had no work. I am an actor! The show must go on! With the pandemic, the cardinal rule of theater and performance was being broken. For a time, the show literally could not go on. I just laid in bed for days. Stared at the walls. I went into a bit of a waking coma. It shook me. And this is back when we still thought that by the end of April, we’d be back to normal!
Ah yes, that charade.
We were all so innocent then, weren’t we? Fortunately, my partner, who is a choreographer and dancer in San Francisco, showed me how to adapt. He taught a weekly dance class in the city, and after the pandemic hit, he started teaching online. He started to gain a following just from doing the same things he was always doing, but he was now doing it in our living room and broadcasting it out. That showed me that the show can go on, it just has to change. I started to do my drag character, Patty from HR, as a weekly show. It really saved my life to have something regular every week to do. I also lost my mom during that time, and being able to perform as Patty helped me work through it.
I also adapted to the pandemic by organizing a big, gay car wash called Studs & Suds in May. It was a part of my live show, Baloney, an all male revue that promotes male intimacy and sexuality. We did a socially-distanced, fully-masked drive-through carwash where the audience never had to get out of their car. They just stayed in their little bubble and the show happened around them. Basically, it’s exactly what it sounds like. Just a bunch of guys and girls in Speedos and skimpy outfits kind of washing your car. Really, it’s kind of 75 percent show, 25 percent wash. You may need a wash after that wash!
It’s getting harder for artists to live in San Francisco. The rent is absurdly high, the fires are getting worse, and now the pandemic is making everything more complicated. As it becomes more difficult for performers to work, would you ever consider leaving the Bay Area?
I don’t know. When I moved here in 2004, San Francisco was like the Emerald City to me. The energy of San Francisco and the gay community was magical, and I knew this is where I wanted to be. But it’s true: it’s become way less affordable for me. I’ve had my low moments where I would see a freeway overpass and think, “I could live under that if I had to.”
But there was this moment that I’ll never forget. I was talking to this older woman who has lived in San Francisco most of her life about how all the tech workers are moving to the city and quadrupling our rent costs, pushing the artists out. And she said, “Just give it time. The Big One will hit and they’ll all go running back to mom.” She was talking about the earthquake that’s long overdue for the Bay, and how the people who aren’t invested in the city will go away and the dedicated artists can rebuild. In a way, the pandemic is the Big One. It happened and there’s a mass exodus occurring. Our building is at 50 percent occupancy right now. It’s like a ghost town. I hope that remaining cultural hubs like Oasis, where Buffy the Vampire Slayer Live! is performed, can survive this chaotic moment, as many other businesses haven’t been able to weather the storm. I feel a responsibility to keep creating culture here and to keep San Francisco queer, weird, super gay, and over the top. For now, at least, I’m here. I’m part of it.
Is there any news as to what will become of the Buffy the Vampire Slayer Live! performances?
Right now, everything is on hold. We threw around the idea of doing something online, like doing a reading of an episode. But then what do you do when a fight scene comes up? I would be an advocate for continuing the show in any form if it’s possible.
Honestly, I look forward to performing Buffy the Vampire Slayer Live! no matter what else I’m doing. I did Angels in America at the Berkeley Rep as an understudy and I got to perform one night. It was the pinnacle of my acting career. It was like, “This is the shit!” but I still thought about how I couldn’t wait to play Buffy because it is pure, unadulterated fun, both for the actors and the audience. I think that as long as Oasis can survive, you’ll be seeing Buffy Live! in the future.
If you love Michael in Buffy Live!, you can check out his short film Mini Supreme, which is about a man playing a little girl with a growth disorder in order to win a beauty pageant. He also runs a successful all-male revue show called Baloney, and he recently made an indie horror movie called Bride of Death, which should be released sometime in the near future. You can also follow him on Instagram at @instaphillis.
